He promised her to meet at eight
A tryst, he’d said, upon the gate.
She scans the trees
And then the sky
But no pigeons flying by
She tweaks a feather here and there
Oh she is a pigeon-fair
He really should appreciate
The luck he had
To get this date!
A glance around, he’s not in sight
Not good enough! And just not right!
He did that dance
All puffed and proud
And billed & cooed
So very loud
She had been certain it was love
He must have dumped her
for that dove!
The fickle sod was just a poser
Just when she was sure
he chose her
But here! Her beau arrives at last!
Slicked-back plumage
Landing fast
Quick as quick she looks right haughty
Mustn’t let him
Think she’s naughty
He talks her round with velvet coos
And words d’amour
he starts to use
My little Pee-jun, honey-bun
How about
a bit of fun?
She listens to his song of love
He didn’t want that
fat old Dove!
It’s her he fancies, now she’s sure
So let’s get on
with that … amour!
It’s pigeon passion!
Lots of necking
After that some gentle pecking
Surely now she’s in the mood?
He hopes she’s not
a pigeon prude!
(or he’ll have to find that fat old dove again)
Now she’s convinced he isn’t fickle
She’ll let him have
some slap & tickle
Her body language tells him Yes!
He doesn’t need
to try and guess
But what is this? He’s started preening!
Has he completely
missed her meaning?
She says: ‘Excuse me! If you please …
What about the birds
and bees?’
Like a bird upon a mission
He quickly gets
into position
Are you ready ma cherie?
he cries
with great alacrity
A blur of feathers then ensues
Accompanied by
bills and coos
Now watching pigeons having sex
must be rated
Triple-X!
Afterwards she’s acting shy
He puffs and preens
A classic guy!
She ponders nests and lasting love
But somewhere near …
I hear a dove …
The author wishes to confirm that although on one occasion the photographer’s camera lens steamed up, no pigeons were embarrassed in the making of this story.
The Writer in the Woods 
Hahaha! Very well done! I’ve never actually seen birds do this, I’d be fascinated. From a purely geeky standpoint, of course. I doubt I’d even consider writing a poem about it 🙂
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Thanks! It was one of those things that just happened. I was talking to my sister and brother in the garden when the birds just arrived and carried on as though we weren’t there! And I happened to have my camera.
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You are a naughty little bird, from your little IRISH bird. Your poem is Naughty but Nice. xoxoxo
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How the heck did you find me??!
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Hilarious. Wonderfully done. Thank you for making me laugh today.
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Thanks Kate. I think one needs a certain type of humour to appreciate such silliness! So pleased it made you laugh.
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I love this Jude! What fun, and such great photos too! Well done! 🙂
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I think those pigeons had fun too!!
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And where is that new post you promised? 🙂 I’ll draw you a pic of amorous birdies if it isn’t forthcoming 🙂
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Soooooon – very soooooon! Honest!
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HaHaHa! So glad I found your blog…and I LOVED this post!
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Thank you! I had a laugh writing it!
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LOL, steamy! No bees required, just the birds. A lot more people would watch nature documentaries if they were written like this 🙂
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Thanks Rochelle – I was laughing as I wrote it!
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This is absolutely fabulous! Thanks for the laugh!
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I’m so glad it’s made so many people laugh!
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Love this 😀 A poem married with some … interesting shots 🙂
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Thanks Colline!
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Have you no shame! 😀
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I looked away at the last minute … honest!
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I guess all the hotels were booked up! 🙂
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Shameless – I had to look away!
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Pigeon sex brilliantly described in words and pictures, absolutely hilarious! 🙂 🙂 🙂
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Well I’ve heard of the term ‘dogging’ so I wonder if this was ‘pigeoning’!! Thanks Gilly.
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You got me laugihing in plain public. People sre starting to stare 😉
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Thanks David – I laughed a lot when I wrote it!
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That is very funny and really clever!
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My only plan is to get out and about on my motorcycle and find some more images. So my new theme remains to be defined, and I will remain here and there and everywhere in the interim.
Thank you Jude (aka pigeon voyeur)
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Thanks Mike. My main plan is the same as yours – to get out and about on my motorcycle – but first I have to get rid of this camping-van and get one!!
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Pingback: A 7X7 Link Award! « The Writer in the Woods
Delightful! Being a voyeur you might appreciate my Sunday Post: Nature.
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Thanks Lynne, I’ll have a look.
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I will certainly have a look Lynne!
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got here via your 7X7 Award post.
what a clever poem to go along with this unique opportunity you and your camera had. thanks for sharing.
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Glad you enjoyed it! 🙂
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This was so great! The photos, the syntax, the story! This post has enriched my day! Z
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I’m so pleased every time someone gets a laugh out of it! Thank you. 🙂
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Really enjoyed this Jude, my kind of poetry. Laughter is good for the soul, and I think some poets forget that!
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