Our tendency to blame


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When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don’t blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change

Thich Nhat Hanh

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Author: Jude

Hello Visitors I'm Jude, and I have a profusion of interests and a passion for motorcycling. I lean towards Buddhism and love silence. I hope you may enjoy some of my musings and meanderings, and if so I'd love to hear your comments.

7 thoughts on “Our tendency to blame”

  1. I don’t blame. If something goes wrong or is wrong, I always look at the positive side of things. Much of it is my awareness … that I know I do wrong things, I mess up intentionally or not. We all have dirt, imperfection, etc … So, why judge? Why blame?


  2. I used to cast a lot of blame when I was younger, but age has given me compassion and understanding. Probably still have a way to go though! You have a curious mind and a big heart Rommel – that helps.πŸ™‚


  3. Hehe, blame the lettuce. I agree: don’t blame the lettuce.
    Then again: the chances are bigger that your friend or family member is being an asshole, than that the lettuce is being an asshole.


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